Nick Johnson Shops at Wal-Mart

I don't know that for sure, but he seems like the kind of guy you could count on to shop there. Ok, I came to the Kennedy Conspiracy (KC) tonight intending to profess my love for Wal-Mart. I was in Tennesee last weekend and was reminded how cool Wal-Mart is (and, I'm writing a paper about Wal-Mart for school). I'm not a huge fan of their clothes or the long lines, but I did want to give props to the big Mart for keeping inflation down and for improving overall economic productivity. No one seems to be picking on Target, but they pay their associates less than Wal-Mart does and provide fewer health benefits. I was planning to go on a rant about this cartoon I posted, but when noticed the quote David put under the KC heading, I changed my mind.

"NICK JOHNSON IS A MARVELOUS, EFFICIENT PLAYER, BUT HE'S AS EXCITING AS WATCHING GEORGE F. WILL WATCH BEN STEIN WATCH PAINT DRY. SO FORGET THAT." (Click on the quote for the source.)

This is the most hilarious thing I've ever heard. It's even funnier than David asking every Target employee he sees if they've seen the ‘Target Lady’ sketch (from SNL). He hasn't found one yet. Anyway, I couldn’t watch George Will watch Ben Stein do anything, not even an impression of Will Ferrell in the ‘Cowbell’ sketch (and that's saying something). But, I could watch Nick Johnson play baseball all day. As a matter of fact, I could just watch him do nothing all day long. Oh, wait. Isn’t that what he’s been doing the last two seasons?? Honestly though, if he was Mormon I’d move into his neighborhood so I could go to church with him. Wouldn’t you? Do you think he wears red knee-high socks over his church pants? Love him.